Fighting Through Anxiety at a Wedding

Anxiety Episodes

Anxious moments used to come often. In line at theme parks, at restaurants, at work, or even my own home. Now, these moments have begun to slow down. Unfortunately, I had a moment of anxiety where I felt like I had no way out. So, let’s set the stage.

I had to drive two and a half hours to go to a wedding where most of the people there would know each other. They all lived in the same town; it was going to be an unofficial “high school reunion” which I loved being an outsider. We also took an uber in preparation for some alcoholic beverages to be there for us to enjoy. No way out.

It was also an outdoor wedding in Florida in May at 3:00… It was 94 degrees for the ceremony with no shade. No water (as it got emptied out) and nowhere to go. We got in our seats at 3:15 and the ceremony ended at 3:45, we baked for 30 minutes. After that was the cocktail hour, which was once again, outside. Our party quickly found a shady spot with chairs which was MUCH needed. I was able to relax much easier, talk with everyone, it seemed to be going well. Just drank water trying to cool off. Social battery was feeling good. I felt good. Just a little hot.

Next, was dinner, I was so excited to get some A/C, my table was filled with people I knew, I was excited. Until there was no A/C. We sat and talked some more, I was fanning myself with a menu, I couldn’t hear anything with how loud it was, I started to get uncomfortable, I went to the bathroom to try and run away but there was a line for the bathroom which only had two stalls and no urinals. Loud in there too. I had the stuck feeling. I couldn’t run away anywhere. I ate my food but still was full of anxiety. I was ready to leave after they cut the cake, and the dance floor opened with it being a hot mess inside the reception I decided to take a walk outdoors.

The sun had begun to set and it was a lot cooler with a breeze. It was quiet and calm outside. Just with the walk I started to improve. Anxiety left me and I was left with a clear head to enjoy my night. I walked to the dance floor at about 6:30, got a drink at the bar which was HEAVY, and the night turned out to be great. It was still warm, and we even took a break in the middle to talk outside where half the wedding guests were sitting, away from the heat. The first half was anxiety-filled for sure, but it turned around quickly. The night ended with a post-midnight snack at Waffle House, a short walk from our hotel. Which had a faceplant from a couple we knew and some good laughs. I would’ve been sitting at my hotel room alone if I listened to my anxiety.

A year ago, that’s exactly what I would do. When anxiety spoke, I listened and ran away. It limited my life; it would have taken some nice memories from me. I paid for it the next day with how tired I was, but it was a wonderful day where I realized how far I had come with my relationship with anxiety. Moving my body is typically the easiest way for me to get out of the negative headspace. The fresh air walk and even the first part of non-drunk dance floor made my experience turn around. Anxiety completely faded away. Also, being able to breathe and power through anxiety helps too. Those are probably my two favorite strategies to turn around anxiety. Sit down and feel it/move my body.

Anxiety will not run my life.